Bar Overflow

I know the exam ended yesterday afternoon. And even if I didn't pass, I don't have to think about that crap again until late December-ish.

But the info is stuck in my brain.

And I'm STILL analyzing real life situations for no apparent reason.

This morning I saw a MasterCard commercial, the one where they say they're giving away 12 cars for you to give friends and family. Of course, I thought about what it would be like to have 12 cars to choose from and/or give away. Then where does my mind go? To the TAX ISSUES involved.

I wish I had taken today off work as well. I'm sure a day of doing nothing but playing XBOX college football and playing with my dog would clear my brain.

So Santa is like the Pope?

And the other Santas are like Cardinals?

Okay, you can stop visiting for a few days

I'm going to have to suspend posting for about a week, at least until Thursday morning. Don't ask why; you know why. I should have something new for you by Monday, August 1, at the latest.

See you on the other side.

522

Ken Griffey Jr. hit his twenty-first home run of the season, 522nd of his career. Junior now stands alone in 14th place on the all-time list, passing Willie McCovey and "The Splendid Splinter" "Teddy Ballgame" Williams.

Very interesting...and not so shtupid

A German man lost his lawsuit to get the government to pay for his toupee. The man claimed the government was discriminating against men by refusing to pay for toupees while covering the cost of wigs for women. The court pointed out how common it is for a man to go bald compared to a woman, and noted that a bald woman would be more likely to be ostracized for being bald than a man.

So now I have to ask you, my loyal readers (both of you), what do you think would happen if this situation arose in the States? What if, instead of a middle-aged man, a younger man went prematurely bald (due to illness, stress, or who knows)?

Definitions

Irony: 1. Getting soaked while walking home, despite carrying an umbrella. 2. Getting within a block and a half of home and then getting splashed by a passing car, soaking your only remaining dry spot. 3. Enduring 1 and 2 above, then realizing when you get home that you need a shower to wash off the rain. See also this post by robin.

Optimism: Enduring definitions 1 through 3 under "irony," yet still clutching your umbrella over your head. See also this post from earlier this week.

A final note. To the red Ford Truck turning right that honked at me for being in the way and taking too long when I was crossing with the walk sign: Fuck off! Go read the driver's manual you were SUPPOSED to read before getting your driver's license (assuming you have one). You yield to me, asswipe!

They're sending secret images through my TV, man!

Sharp has developed a new television designed to allow different people to watch different shows at the same time, on the same screen.

Putting aside how viewers are supposed to listen to the different shows (not to mention how absolutely creepy it is to see a mirror image of the tv with a completely different picture), this is sort of a cool idea. Assuming, of course, you can get enough seating on both sides of the tv to accommodate everyone.

I think the really cool part of the article is the plan to use to technology to create cell phones that can protect your privacy by not allowing others to peek over your shoulder and view your private info.

Umbrella Dilemma

If you're walking in a very light rain with an umbrella, do you

• open the umbrella and look like a wimp for needing an umbrella in such a light rain, or
• keep the umbrella closed and look like a moron for carrying a closed umbrella?

So what was the greatest thing BEFORE sliced bread?

Woo hoo! My brain isn't totally fried! (Yet)

I just graded another practice MBE and my scaled score was well above halfway to passing. Yes!! I have to say, that's a hell of confidence booster with just two weeks to go.

"Moon Pie . . . What a time to be alive"

The subway and bus bombings in London last week shined the spotlight on a growing phenomenon of the technological age: the emergence of amateur journalists. Digital cameras and camera cell phones are giving us a chance to view events much sooner after they occur than traditional news photos.

Sometimes such footage and images are important to a clearer understanding of how the events unfolded. And, of course, there may be times when they provide useful evidence for an investigation. Regardless of how important or useful such coverage may be, it will undoubtedly be popular; look at tv shows like Maximum Exposure that thrive in showing us footage of things gone terribly wrong, such as an ATV rolling over on a moron who tries to ride it up a steep hill.


Okay, I'll admit. This post really had no point. I just wanted to use the quote for the title. =P

16 year-old's Stripper Birthday Party

A couple of parents decided to give their son a "special" gift for his 16th birthday: a stripper.

So, guess what time it is again (finally). Yes, it's

What Were Their Thoughts?

Sweet Strip-teen Edition

• We'll be the most popular parents in the neighborhood!
• Who will find out? None of the boys would ever say a thing about it!
• Well at least we're not hiring him a prostitute.
• What teen wouldn't love getting a lap dance in front of his parents and his grandpa?
• Well if he's going to start going to the strip club with his father he needs to learn how to tip properly.
• Oh, I've absolutely got to have a picture of my baby's first lap dance!

C'mon, people; I know you've got some good ones out there.

Well, the description is right on

... but I don't like strawberry ice cream. Except sometimes the strawberry in Neopolitan. I'm not all about the strawberry bits. Yick.

You Are Strawberry Ice Cream

A bit shy and sensitive, you are sweet to the core. You often find yourself on the outside looking in. Insightful and pensive, you really understand how the world works. You are most compatible with chocolate chip ice cream.

What Flavor Ice Cream Are You?

Bar Review Thought

Legally speaking, checks are a pain in the ass.

One of Those Days

Don't you hate days that aren't really "bad" but are definitely not good? You can't even complain about them because they're not bad days.

Bah....

Edit, by popular demand (yes, 1 out of 3 regulars constitutes popular demand around here): First off, I am TIRED. (Well, I was for most of the day, anyway.) I'm sure everyone studying for the bar is tired right now. But the last time I remember being this tired for this long since when I was losing weight. That was almost 10 years ago. Second, I'm not enjoying my job. No, I will not go into details. It's just a temporary job (to the employer, also, not just to me), and that's all I have to say about it. Next, I forgot to pack a lunch today. I've been brown-bagging so that I can work through lunch to get my hours and still leave early to make it to bar review. Lunch has mostly been sandwiches, usually PB&J. But then we ran out of J and haven't been back to the grocery yet. And PB sandwiches without milk are not a good idea, especially when you're eating lunch at your desk. While this shouldn't present much of a problem, normally, because I always have the option of going out to lunch, I am also without cash. Not because I'm broke, but just because I tend not to carry cash, and even when I do it's very little; I rely more on my debit card. What's the problem with this? Of course! Where I would go for lunch, doesn't accept cards. 'But TWG, can't you just go somewhere else?' Yes, except for the fact that I would have to walk. We have one car and ThatWunWife goes to work later than I do, so she drops me off at work in the morning. The only other acceptable restaurant within an acceptable walking distance is one I don't really like. Or didn't want at lunchtime, anyway. Also, when I first typed this post, I was still trudging through the Negotiable Instruments outline and had the bar review lecture and a 35 minute walk home to look forward to before I could be home again and rest and eat.

I told you it wasn't worth complaining. You asked for it. =P

Make it stop!!

ThatWunWife dragged me shopping yesterday, a form of torture by itself. At one point I was sitting outside the fitting rooms waiting, when I heard one of the most horrible things ever over the store's sound system. The music in department stores isn't supposed to be great, I understand. It's just there to be gentle, soothing background noise that keeps you shopping. Something better than the low drone produced by the ventilation system and the mass of people. Sort of the same concept as not putting a clock in a store and limiting the number of clocks in a mall; get them to stay longer and they'll spend more. So anyway, a melody starts, soft and kind of tinkling. I think, Wait, I know this. A few notes later and I was in sheer agony. The song was "Everyday" by Buddy Holly (one of my many favorite artists; if you don't know the song or need a refresher you can click here and listen to the sample). The problem: It was the slowed down, sanitized, "elevator music" version. Painful. So very painful. But it got worse. No, seriously, it did. If you don't pay much attention, (and obviously, this musician hadn't) the song can sound kind of cheery and upbeat. If you haven't heard it, it is optimisitic, but it's still about unrequited love. So how does Mr. Keep Shopping, Everything is Fine choose to sing it? How else?! Bubblegum pop sickly sticky sweet! Yep. "I'm so happy that you don't love me yet and I'm here all alone with no one at all. Yep. So darn happy I could burst, by golly." EXCRUCIATING. Almost made me want to shop more if it meant avoiding that damn song.
Thinking about it again has upset me so much that I may just have to go home and break out the album to get it off my mind. Not sure why I didn't last night.